NotSheep

For those scratching their heads: the title comes from Helen’s very (ahem) helpful comment

Seriously. Not a word of English between them, unless you count the aforementioned “Google” and “Toshiba”, and frankly, I think you’d be hard pushed to consider the word “Toshiba” English, however broad an accent you say it in. And the funny thing is, despite our total and complete lack of ability to speak to each other, I really like them. They’re lovely. They’re funny and cheerful and co-operative and treat each other well and they just seem like really nice kids

Was it terribly anglo-centric of me to have assumed they would understand at least rudimentary English? I was thinking along the lines of: teenagers, industrialised nation, bound to have had some English lessons. But it seems not, unless they’re playing a great big joke on me. Though if it turns out that everybody else in the group speaks English and I got the only four who don’t, there’ll be heads rolling

I found that the Altavista Babelfish translator worked on my laptop; I have no idea how good or bad the translation is, but it’s bound to get more of the idea across than anything else I can do. Between that and showing them photographs, I managed to get across to them what the options for today were. Since four of them plus my own children makes more-than-fits-in-the-car, we were limited this morning - but the castle’s only five minutes away, so I made two trips and got everyone there. They all seemed to enjoy the castle, sometimes even making jokes that we all got (like comparing heights of lifesize models of Normans to themselves). Jack just kept on talking to them, either oblivious of their inability to understand him, or just not caring about it, and since none of them seemed to mind, I let him continue.

I offered them McDonald’s for lunch; all their travel equipment has McD’s logo on it, so presumably they’ve provided sponsorship and I figured they would probably a) recognise and b) eat it. Walking from the castle to McD’s though, it occurred to me that there’s a Pizza Hut next to it, so I asked if they recognised that, which they did, and asked which they’d prefer. They chose Pizza Hut. That worked out well, partly because there’s a barbecue tonight so it was better to avoid the burgers, and also partly because it’s a buffet, so I figured everyone would at least have access to something they liked to eat. It’s also an all-you-can-eat buffet, and these are, after all, four teenage boys, so I figured we’d get our money’s worth - and having seen the quantity of pasta that Freddy alone put away, I wasn’t wrong. Scratchy arrived part-way through the meal - he took a half-day today - which meant we had two cars available and were able to go further afield: a bowling alley.

Ten-pin bowling turned out to be a very good idea. Everyone had fun, everyone laughed and cheered and enjoyed the jokes (like the flukiest strike ever after the ball bounced off the rails no less than three times), and it didn’t require many actual words. I have no idea if my Japanese Scouts had ever bowled before, and no way of finding out.

I have photos from both bowling and the castle, and will post them tonight if I’m not too tired to sit up straight.

After bowling we headed home - I stopped to put over £70 worth of fuel in my car! - and after about 15 minutes of effort, I got the message across that they had a couple of hours free before this evening’s barbecue. At least I think I got the message across.