NotSheep

An email from France this morning tells us that Barney was giggling with Henry and his sister in their room this morning - and that Barney was giggling the loudest of the lot

We’ve spent most of the morning outside; I’ve washed all the downstairs windows, including the conservatory, and stared at the upstairs windows, partly wondering how to get them cleaned and partly hoping the power of my stare will make the dirt fall off Jack and Toby took a bucket of soapy water and washed the last of the patio chairs - a chore started yesterday by George, Freddy, Jack and friend R. R stayed over last night too; they were all asleep surprisingly early, though that didn’t start the morning from starting with a meltdown for George, followed an hour or two later by R deciding to go home because I told him off for having a super-soaker - full of water - upstairs on the landing. Freddy and George followed him, had lunch at his house, and I can now hear the three voices through the open window and, if I look out, can just see their heads appearing and disappearing over the hedge as they jump on the trampoline.

I do like this time of year; everything is waking up from the winter and it’s so nice to start living partly outside again. My plants are coming on too: I now have the shoots of several basil plants and about three tomato plants and a lettuce. Every time I look at my tray, I find another little shoot of something. Scratchy says staring at them doesn’t work, but I think the evidence shows otherwise

Scratchy has gone all soft and seems prepared to let me have nearly anything I want at the minute. Suggestions for things I should go for should be left in the comments

A couple of years ago, I bought lengths of a fine mesh fabric which can be attached to doorframes and windows by way of stickyback velcro-type strips. In the summer, it’s very effective for keeping out insects - I put it on the windows that are usually open, and also on the conservatory door, which leads into the garden and therefore spends most of every warm and/or sunny day lying open. In North America, this kind of insect-control comes as standard on doors and windows, but living here, this is the best we can do. It works very well though, and it’s easy to take down at the end of the summer.

So does anybody know what I did with mine when I took it down at the end of last summer? Because I’ve been through all the places I think I might have put it, and it isn’t in any of them

Today the conservatory door has been open since about 9.30. Toby and Jack have spent most of the day out in the garden; they are loving getting outside to play. Jack has spent half his time on the trampoline and half of it playing with Toby, pushing him on the swing etc. We have a swing-set which includes a boat-swing, which is great for little kids because they’re more steady on it than on an ordinary swing-seat. Toby has figured out how to climb onto it and off it, and he appears to be working on figuring out how to get onto the trampoline… Jack has also dug a few new holes in the lawn

I do like getting them outdoors. I’ve a friend who has recently had her fifth baby (and first girl) who passes on the advice another mother of four boys gave to her: treat them like a litter of puppies and assume they need exercise and outdoor-time every day. I think she’s hit the nail on the head; I certainly see a difference in atmosphere when we manage to get everyone out and moving - and the only reason we don’t do it every day is that I’m often too lazy

George and Freddy did some French with me this morning and we talked about how they could manage their time so they could do all the things they want to do. Freddy has spent most of the afternoon playing on the computer and watching television - though the recorder thing is playing up, so I’ll have to have a look at that - and George sat for ages this afternoon sewing two huge badges onto his ju-jitsu gi, since he’s being graded tonight (Freddy is too, but he picked up a faulty badge, so we have to get a replacement before it can be sewed on). I have no idea why ju-jitsu badges have to be so massive; it seems totally unreasonable to me and I’m just glad that George can sew them himself. Having finished the sewing, he and Freddy are now also outside, joined by R, who appears to have forgiven me for telling him off yesterday.

As for what do I want… well, there’s definitely a theme in those comments I do have a list, and yes, a baby is on that list (though I don’t think I’m ovulating, so don’t hold your breath for an announcement). It’s not the only thing on the list, of course, though the list is surprisingly short, and surprisingly non-materialistic for someone who enjoys her home comforts like I do Watch this space

I’m very pleased with how my veg are coming along - lots of little green shoots: two lettuce, five tomato, five basil and a sweet pepper, as well as a bit that might or might not be the beginnings of an onion - not bad for a complete ignoramus such as myself

Except when the customer is wrong.

A few weeks ago, we bought a combined freeview box/hard-disk recorder. It’s convenient and easy to use, and we were impressed. We had a slight problem setting it up, but the helpline suggested resetting it and once that was done, it was fine. A few days ago, it started resetting itself and then freezing, so today I took it back.

Sort of.

Got a refund, bought a different brand. Came home. Left it to be set up this evening. Scratchy said, “Weren’t you supposed to take this back?” The hard-disk recorder is still sitting here.

What I actually took back was the box it came in, the instruction manuals, all the bits of plastic and styrofoam and… our DVD player.

In my defence, I was trying to get the boys out the door and into the car and pack it all up, and just grabbed it and put it in the box. Or not, as it turned out.

George and Freddy sat in the back of the car today playing a game they’ve made up: one of them says the name of an animal, the other has to say whether it’s a reptile or an amphibian. I didn’t know half of them but they seem clued-in. Yesterday their back-of-car conversation took the form of a detailed, feature-by-feature comparison of a Komodo dragon and Toby - which one would win in a race. Do normal families have these kinds of conversations?

Also today: purchased sunflower seeds at the garden-centre, since the ones I harvested from last year’s sunflowers don’t seem to be doing anything. Got shoeboxes from the garden centre too, to be used for making shoebox guitars with the Beavers. I know, shoeboxes, garden centre - don’t ask. It’s just been a surreal kind of day.

Scratchy had today off - it’s not a public holiday here (we get Monday and Tuesday instead) but Toby had an appointment for a speech therapy assessment. Although he’s only 20 months, speech delays are often associated with his condition, so when we received the diagnosis, we requested an assessment for two reasons: one, to give us a chance to speak with someone who could give us suggestions for how we could help him, and two, to get us on the waiting-list for actual speech therapy, rather than waiting until he was two or three years old and then having to wait for months. The assessment took nearly six months to come through, so that seems to have been a wise move.

Right now Toby has a few sounds that sound like words but not any real words. He does use lots of appropriate intonation though, and copies much of what he sees, and these are good signs. I can see his speech developing; it’s just a bit late. He understands everything we say, and a delay in itself doesn’t worry me; he won’t be going to nursery school, so it’s not a big deal if he’s not speaking clearly by the age that would usually start (which is three, here).

The appointment went well, although Toby slept through most of it The speech therapist was positive and pleasant and agreed with me when I had a moan about their pre-assessment form (which you post back to them before you get an appointment) being non-breastfeeding-friendly - questions like, “Does your child still take a bottle? If not, when did he/she stop?” - I see the need for the questions but feel they could be phrased in a way that doesn’t normalise formula-feeding. Anyway, I digress… the SLT gave us lots of information and suggestions about what we could do, and said she felt Toby was doing everything he needed to be doing, and that lots of children this age don’t have any “English words”, so she wasn’t particularly concerned. She’s suggested that she assesses him again in a year (though is happy to see us sooner if we feel it would be useful) - and since we’ve had the initial assessment, we shouldn’t have to wait more than a couple of weeks for an appointment. So we got exactly what we wanted out of this appointment

In the meantime, Scratchy took George, Freddy and Jack to W5, where there were lots of extra activities laid on because of Easter, including “The Great Eggscape: Barnyard Breakout”, in which they got small egg-shaped toys along the lines of Mr Potato Head, had to build their creature, and then raced them in Lego Racers. They all had a great time; however there are no photos (a first: a W5 visit and no pics!) because Scratchy forgot to take the camera and I forgot to remind him. He did have his phone, but a) it takes lousy photos and b) its battery was dead, so you’ll just have to use your imagination

This evening Barney and his French family will be driving north about 700 km to visit his “French grandmother”, and then on Monday they’ll drive another 400 km to visit his “German grandmother”, who lives near Frankfurt. What an international child: grandmothers in France, Germany, Ireland and Canada - and that last one originally from China! This week has been better for him than last week was (thank goodness), and I think this trip (and some time off school) is good timing for him. We’ll be talking to him tomorrow, so I’ll update then

My children are full of chocolate and it’s only 20 past 9…

While they were getting dressed and cleaning their teeth, the Easter Bunny set up an Easter Egg Hunt in the garden and a trail through the conservatory to lead them to it

Their reaction was so worth a few minutes traipsing through the wet grass (I’m sure the Easter Bunny would agree ;-))

We’re off to visit friends later - they’ve a caravan on the coast, which they’ve very kindly said we can borrow sometimes. Since they’re schoolies (both kids in school and dad’s a teacher), we can use it during term-times. I haven’t stayed in a caravan since I was about four years old though, so we’ll see how we feel after the first go Today’s just a visit to make sure we can find it and to see how it all works - and to see our friends too, of course

We spoke to Barney yesterday morning; he sounds a little better but still quite flat. He was tired after the long drive last night, which is probably part of it, but he also says he’s bored. I hope the next couple of weeks improves things for him.

It’s been a month since Barney and Henry left.

I thought it would be difficult at first, but get easier. So far, it’s been quite the opposite. I’m getting used to the house not being so busy, but I’m missing Barney more than ever. We’d never been apart for more than two nights in a row until now. The last month has been the longest in my life.

Henry’s birthday was earlier this week; I wrote a “happy birthday” post the day before, and saved it with the next day’s date so it would post on the right day. Except that I didn’t; I somehow managed to set the date to May instead of April, so it didn’t show up. So… my apologies, and belated birthday wishes to Henry! I feel even more disorganised since I didn’t get to the post office to post his birthday card last week either, and then they were closed until Wednesday, so his card was sent late too - though since they’re away in Germany this week, he won’t get it until they get back anyway.

The pups are keeping us busy; they’re very funny and really remarkably good for their age. They were a bit unsure of things on Wednesday, but yesterday they were much more settled. We spent most of the day outside, mowing the grass and tidying the garden and the space around the house, and the pups had a great time frolicking on the grass. The boys did too

A tip for the budding gardener: When using electric hedge-trimmers to tidy up the trees and bushes in your garden, they will be more efficient if you do not cut through the power-cord.

And a tip for the budding gardener’s spouse: If your wife cuts through the power-cord of the electric hedge-trimmers, it is not advisable to look at her and make hmph-ing noises that suggest you would not have done the same thing because you are not stupid.

Anyway, aside from that, today we have -
- taken Freddy to his last swimming-class; I’m waiting for the instructor who was teaching Barney to get back to me about lessons for George and Freddy.
- taken George, Freddy and Jack to a birthday-party for R (who lives across the road, for now) - a party which took place in a play-centre about 15 minutes away, and which began approximately 25 minutes after I heard about it. Not only did we make it on time, but I even managed to brush my hair, throw on a clean shirt, and pick the bits of bushes out of the rest of my clothing.
- continued trying to teach Cass and Andie that the great outdoors is where you do that.
- introduced Cass and Andie to R and his family, all of whom went “awwwww….”

Scratchy is talking to Barney on the phone as I write; I’ve already had a chat with him and he sounds brighter this week. We seem to phone him in a different place every week - a case of “if it’s week five it must be Frankfurt…”

Although half the schools around here are still on holiday, I sat the boys around the table this morning to do a bit of studying, mainly because Freddy and George needed to get back into some routine. They did some history and geography, and a bit of French and a bit of German, then I went to the library to collect a couple of reserved books while George stayed here to watch the pups (I was only gone for about 15 minutes, but we’ve not left the pups alone in the house at all so far). After lunch we hovered around the garden, which now looks much better, Scratchy having repaired the hedge-trimmers and completed the job. We haven’t done the trees and bushes at the front yet; maybe I’ll get to those tomorrow. Or maybe, since I haven’t planned Beavers tomorrow night yet, I won’t.

There were three girls bouncing on the trampoline in the garden that backs onto ours, and when I heard them oohing and aahing over the world’s most gorgeous puppies, I called over to them that they were welcome to come over and play with them. Seconds later they were at the door. They were here for over two hours and I’m not sure who enjoyed it more: the girls or the dogs Plenty of good socialisation for the pups there - and yesterday they got some canine socialisation in, meeting their first non-related dog, a miniature schnauzer owned by friends of ours, and who we dog-sit fairly regularly. After a bit of wariness and sniffing, the three dogs soon settled into a pattern of playing and chasing each other, and meanwhile we had a lovely afternoon with our friends

It’s been a quiet week; we’re not going far from home because the pups aren’t old enough (or trained enough) to go anywhere yet. The boys have done some of their usual routine activities: George and Jack came with Freddy and me to Beavers and we all planted sunflower seeds in peat pots and the Beavers took them home with them, and on Wednesday George had Cubs. It still seems much too quiet without the extra running-about that we did with Barney and Henry.

C&A (the dogs! LOL) are doing really well; despite being only seven weeks old and having just been here a week, their only accidents are now when they don’t have access to outside, and they are getting better at using the bit of the garden we’ve set aside as their spot - otherwise known as “the trading post”, because if they do their stuff there, they get to trade it for a treat Everyone says they’re gorgeous - even people who are not at all into animals keep gushing over them… and I counted back to work out when they were born, and discovered that they share my birthday, a fact which excited me far more than is reasonable for a grown woman

My laptop is not behaving; it keeps giving me a scary-sounding message about a cooling system error, so I’ve backed everything up and Scratchy has been experimenting with it. He thinks it’s an OS-related problem; if he’s right it’s good because it means the laptop doesn’t have to disappear for a week for expensive repairs, but it’s bad because it might mean re-installing everything. At least I do regular backups now, so if I do have to re-install from scratch, it’s not such a big deal - just time-consuming, really. If it turns out Scratchy’s wrong… well, anybody know a good deal on a very compact notebook pc?

No Barney, no Henry, possibly no laptop for a bit… lucky I’ve got those pups to keep me busy really

We spoke to Barney on the phone this morning. Although he said things were okay, he still sounds low, and we’ve had an email this evening telling us that he’s withdrawn and does not show enthusiasm for things the family is doing, and does not seem to be trying to speak French. I know Barney is a perfectionist; he doesn’t like to do things unless he’s confident he can do them right, and I also get the feeling he’s holding his feelings in - perhaps he thinks if he opens up it will be too much for him, or for someone else, to cope with.

I’ve been looking at my blog posts from back in October, when Henry had been here about the same length of time that Barney has been in France; certainly this was the most difficult part of his time here for us, and I think for him too. So maybe the timing is part of it too - but it’s not going to improve if he isn’t making an effort.

Maybe we should have done Wife Swap instead; dancing on a bar couldn’t be as hard as this

…is driving me nuts. Jack has a habit of asking for things indirectly - for example he’ll see some biscuits or toast and instead of just asking for some, he’ll say, “I’m still hungry…” I find it very irritating.

The most recent news on Barney is that he seems a little bit brighter. We’ll be talking to him on the phone again at the weekend, and I’ll remind him that the success of the exchange, and how much he enjoys it, largely depends on how much effort he makes. Perhaps he’s a bit too laid-back for his own good? I’m just glad things are sounding a little better.

The rest of us have been doing our usual things. I’ve been doing more French, German and maths with Freddy and George. Freddy didn’t go to ju-jitsu on Monday evening, as a result of an attempt to kick Toby - well, not really an attempt, he wasn’t actually going to do it, rather he just waved his leg in that direction, but we have a policy that if you can’t cope with life at home with the family, you’re not able to cope with life anywhere else with the general public… so he had an early night instead. George did go to ju-jitsu, however, but was found in the bathroom after 10 p.m., which meant that he was very tired all day yesterday. He decided to go to bed instead of SJA Badgers - entirely his decision (and not like him to be so mature LOL). He did actually go to sleep early; both he and Toby were fast asleep when Freddy and Jack and I got back from Beavers. M, the boy next door, has also joined us at Beavers for the last two weeks, and it is, according to his mum, “a big hit”. Last night we made a huge poster about what life might be like in the future, then played a game where the Beavers had to “collect” each other like magnets, which they thought was fantastic - and I’ve just had an idea for a variation on that, turning it into a sort of tag, rather than teams… I’m only writing this to remind myself, so you can all ignore me

The pups have been taking up a fair amount of time, as pups do. They’re really pretty good, and we’re doing a little obedience training with them each day. They are growing fast, particularly Cass, whose collar I’ve had to adjust already - she’s going to be twice the size of Andie, I think.

My laptop is still misbehaving, something to do with the fan, we think. Scratchy thought it was OS-related, but experiments seemed to disprove that, so then he decided to dismantle it - he had it spread across the table in hundreds of bits - I couldn’t look, too squeamish When he put it back together, it seemed to work - for a couple of days, then the error message re-appeared. So it seems better, but not fixed. Sigh.

The trampoline has been temporarily turned into a gardening table, as we’ve been re-potting lots of shoots of various things. I got loads of pots from a woman on Freecycle, though I could still use a few bigger ones. (I also got a Little Tikes climbing-frame for the garden - missing a bit, but still very usable). All the plants have to go into pots; I could plant some stuff along the borders in the garden, around the bushes, but the pups would probably dig them up, whereas I can move pots outside the garden into the driveway (which goes down the side of the house, we’re not talking front garden full of potatoes a la Good Life here). I have high hopes for my sweet peppers and garlic - mostly because, of all the things we’ve planted, they’re my favourites to eat

Off to the garden-centre for more compost now…

In lieu of a proper post, since I haven’t got one written, and it’s been a while.

Freddy: This exchange isn’t much fun for me
Me: What do you mean?
Freddy: It’s no fun with Barney away. I have nobody to have Pokemon battles with.
Me: Oh. So you miss him?
Freddy: Yes.
George: I even miss him teasing me. Freddy sometimes tries to tease me to make me feel better, but it’s not the same.

George: It’s burning out here!
Freddy: It’s so hot and it’s not even summer!
George: That’s because of global warming.
Freddy: Yes, it’s getting hotter
George: And the polar caps are melting
Freddy: And that’s making the sea-levels rise…but it won’t cover this country.

There was a deal that they could watch a movie if they had their rooms tidy, laundry put away, teeth cleaned and pyjamas on by a certain time. I warned them that they had one minute left.
Freddy: Waaaaahhhhh!
George: Freddy, don’t give up!

Only those who know George and Freddy and who know that Freddy is the sensible one (yes, really) will understand my reaction to that one.

Proper blogging will resume, uh, sometime soon.

As usual when I don’t blog for a few days, I can’t remember what we’ve done for large portions of the time. This is why I try to post every day, even if it’s just “did maths, had lunch” - because otherwise I’m lost. Take last Thursday, for example. I have no idea what we did. I’m pretty sure I did some bookwork with George and Freddy and Jack, I’m sure I spent some time with the pups, I’m confident that I ate stuff (I’d remember if I didn’t eat, believe me) - but beyond that? No idea.

On Friday we had my friend S and her children over to spend the afternoon and meet C&A. Her son R kept getting as close to them as he dared, then yelling “Werewolf! Werewolf!” and running away Eventually, in order to give the pups some peace to sleep and keep R out of every other room in the house, we left C&A in the conservatory and we all went out to the garden and locked the doors

Friday evening was a Cubs district event - a sports night at a forest park about 40 minutes from here. Scratchy was very tired and didn’t even want to go to basketball (!) so I took George and R from across the road (who also goes to Cubs regularly now), and drove the two of them, three other Cubs and Akela (the Cub leader) to the event. I took my scarf with me in case I was needed in an official capacity; just as well really, since there were, counting me, two of us. The sports evening was a huge success: the weather was perfect, the boys (and girls, mustn’t forget there are girls too now) had lots of fun, the barbecue was efficient and edible (which is all you can ask, really, when you’re feeding several hundred Cubs plus related adults), and I got to meet quite a few other leaders from the district - all Cub leaders, of course, not Beavers, but it was still good to get to know some of them a bit.

Driving home was horrible; I reckoned on 45 minutes, including the time taken to leave everyone off at their houses, but three separate road-closures and the resultant traffic jam meant it took one-and-a-half hours. Believe me, one-and-a-half hours with five hyper Cubs in the back feels like a lot longer. I was pretty wiped out by the time I got home. Partly as a result of that, I spent Saturday with a splitting headache - the kind that just stops you functioning - as well as being exhausted. In the afternoon I went to bed for a couple of hours, but things didn’t really improve until about 7 p.m.

We spoke with Barney in the morning; he sounded a little brighter again, although during the first few minutes of the call, when I was speaking with Henry’s parents, Barney was crying, so he was still a bit weepy when he got on the phone. He did start sounding better during the call though, and laughed when I told him of the missing-Barney conversation I reported earlier. At one point I reminded him to talk to Henry’s parents and tell them how he was feeling, and he said, “D’accord…I mean, okay” All the other boys also got a chance to speak to him for a minute or two each - even Toby, who had a big grin on his face when I asked if he wanted to talk to Barney, and an even bigger grin when he heard Barney’s voice. The exchange rules say that calls should be no longer than 20 minutes, but there are so many of us it always ends up being about an hour I think all Henry’s calls were about that long too though, so maybe it’s nothing to do with numbers Scratchy says he feels that he actually spends more time talking with Barney now than he did when he was here

Yesterday was spent sorting out the garage, trimming the bushes at the front of the house (and managing not to cut through the electrical cord this time), playing in the garden, retrieving the pups from the neighbours’ garden - every time we think we have their escape route blocked, they find another one. At least they’re growing fast and will be too big to squeeze under the fence soon - Andie is now about 9 pounds, and Cass is 14… and they’re not even 9 weeks old yet