NotSheep

With less than two weeks to go before Barney and Henry leave for France, it’s proving a little difficult to organise things without actually thinking about them. Barney and I went shopping again this evening to find shoes for him - with Freddy in tow, because he needed new trainers too. I think we’ve got everything on the list now; I just have to actually find the list before I can be sure

Oh, and just before I continue, I’d like a small moan please. Barney really dislikes getting new clothes, new shoes, etc. In fact he only tolerates getting clean clothes, never mind new ones. So while he’s accepted that some shopping is indeed an essential part of the preparations for going to France, he’s keen to have it over and done with. So it doesn’t really matter what I suggest - he just says it’s fine. He disappears into the fitting-rooms and comes out ten minutes later to say that everything is excellent (translation: “so can we go now?”). It makes shopping for him very difficult.

Henry, on the other hand, is quite the opposite. He knows exactly what he wants, and won’t settle for anything else. So after visiting twenty different shoe-shops and having considered every possible design (it seems to me), he does a sort of verbal version of the Gallic shrug and says “Ah, I’ll wait.” It makes shopping for him very difficult.

But anyway. I did have a nice birthday, thank you to those who sent greetings My friend S came over with her children, and her four-year-old, on hearing it was my birthday, asked what my cake looked like. Well, you know, if you’re four, birthday=party=cake, right? We did have a small cake stashed, so when Scratchy got home everyone sang to me and the cake was cut and eaten.

Tuesday evening brought Beavers; we made thank-you cards for the police who arranged our visit to the station last week, and for the people at the marina we visited three weeks ago. I delivered the cards yesterday morning, then we all went to the library to return the many many books that we’d accumulated. I wish they’d just issue us with one card for the whole family; it would save me a lot of logging in and out on the library site to see what books we’ve got!

In the afternoon another local home-ed mum and her son came over to visit, and in the evening George went to Cubs, taking Henry with him, to talk to the Cubs about France, at the request of Akela. He also took his friend R, who lives across the road, but whose family is moving once they sell their house - they’re only moving a few minutes away, but George and Freddy aren’t very happy about them going. R had a great time at Cubs and plans on returning, so at least they’ll get to see one another once a week even if we (the parents) don’t manage to organise get-togethers.

Today was spent at our second home, aka the science centre. Blog-post and photos will follow later, once I’ve got myself a bit more organised

Lots going on today. We started by looking out the window to assess the weather, and, on the basis of the clouds and drops of rain, deciding to do some indoor activity. So, having had so much fun last time, we decided to go ten-pin-bowling again. En route, I called a friend who’d expressed an interest in joining us, but got her answering service. Five minutes later she sent me a text message to say she was at the hospital with her son, who’d cut his tongue - but then a little while later she rang to say they were home again, and hearing where we were, she decided to join us

Jack completely whipped the rest of us - scoring 25% more than his nearest competitor

We had lunch out (pizza), had a quick peek in a recently-opened shop, then I took the boys swimming. Today was Barney’s last swimming lesson; we’ll be too busy next week and then he’ll be gone - but I asked him and George to show me what they can do, and was impressed by how far they’ve come in just a few weeks. The private lessons are more expensive than the classes, but I think in the end it’s better value because their skills develop more quickly. We’ll consider getting lessons for George and Freddy over the next few months. Jack is, I think, still not ready for lessons; although he’s very comfortable in the water (leaping in from the sides, flinging himself under the water, all without a second’s hesitation), he’s just too set on his own agenda. Toby, however, tries to do everything he sees his brothers do - which today included hanging onto a float and kicking, lying on his back and kicking, and zooming down the slide.

After that we were more than ready to come home for a rest, though Henry went back out again to basketball with Scratchy. All home now and all in bed and quiet - I think we finally wore them out

The anxiety is showing, and it built to a crescendo yesterday evening while I was out. Scratchy accidentally dislodged a GameBoy game from Barney’s GameBoy while it was saving - which resulted in the deletion of the entire game. Barney has been working on this game for many weeks, gaining points, collecting all the things you’re meant to collect, etc - and it was just the last straw. Total meltdown ensued, then Barney stomped off to bed, choosing not to go to Cadets. Henry decided that if Barney wasn’t going, he didn’t want to go, so they missed their last week.

This morning Barney, in floods of tears, told me what had happened. He was upset about his game, upset about Scratchy’s reaction (”It’s just a game”), upset about… well, everything. He sat with me and cuddled for ages, crying on and off, and we talked. He seemed a lot more settled afterwards, though I don’t think he’s quite forgiven Scratchy yet. In one way, though, it was a good thing, as it got his feelings out a bit.

Henry isn’t as stressed as Barney, but he is a bit withdrawn. This is a very hard time for all of us.

Otherwise it’s been another day of hanging out. I went to the play resource centre to pick up some things for Beavers, and in the evening I took George to Cubs early so I could get the Beavers board in the hall all set up properly and work out who was due which badges. We’re going to have given out between 60 and 80 badges by June - which is between 60 and 80 more than they got last year We’re up to fifteen Beavers, not including Jack, who usually comes with me but isn’t officially a Beaver (not old enough yet), and we have our first female member

George enjoyed Cubs, and Barney and Henry had their last night at Scouts - the Scout group said goodbye to them and gave them cards and presents.

Tomorrow Henry is going to school - sort of. One of his friends from Scouts asked if he would go into his school during a French class, and since he’s willing, he’ll be off to do that at lunchtime, then we’ll be off to visit friends and say goodbye to them too.

Blogger has just allowed me to sign in for the first time in weeks. I’ve not even been able to load the sign-in page for ages. So those of you who have Blogger blogs - beware! I shall be doing much commenting today! Well, this morning anyway, since I won’t be here this afternoon

This afternoon Henry went to his friend C’s school, to his French class. I wasn’t sure what the teacher was planning, but it seems that she just asked Henry to read something in French so the class could write it down, and then the pupils were given a chance to ask him questions in French. I can’t help thinking that asking questions in English might have been better; their French isn’t good enough yet to discuss how life in France differs, or what school in France is like, or how he’s found the exchange - all of which might have been more stimulating than asking questions like “quel âge as tu?”, which they’ve probably already asked and answered dozens of times.

While I was waiting in the foyer for Henry and C, another mother came in and asked for one of the teachers; she was obviously angry about something. Henry and C came out; I chatted with C for a minute and then we heard a noise along the hall behind the boys. We turned to see the parent and the teacher, along with a couple of others, involved in a physical fight! I shut the door between us and the fight, and knocked at the secretary’s office to tell her, but she didn’t even seem surprised

Henry seemed a bit down when we left, and said he was thinking about going home. I think he’ll be fine once he gets there and sees his family and friends, but I can understand that right now he’s thinking more about leaving us than seeing them.

He told me that the French teacher spoke to him a little in French; I asked how her accent was and he said it was okay. I commented, “Probably better than mine!” and he said, “About the same.” When I looked surprised (it’s a long time since I was fluent!), he said “Your French is good enough to teach French” - which is flattering - and then he added, “But I think you would be better as a maths teacher.”

We spent the rest of the afternoon visiting my friend S’s house; she made a chocolate cake to wish Henry and Barney “bon voyage” and Toby swept her floors for her. To see him with brooms and mops, anyone would think I did housework

Tomorrow

I feel sick.

That’s what Barney said on the telephone anyway

Their journey went smoothly and they’ve arrived safely. Henry is delighted to be back and pleased with his newly-painted bedroom, and Barney loves the house and the location and the weather and… well, apparently, everything about France.

So far, he’s handling all this better than I could ever have imagined

After the previous post, several people left comments or sent emails asking how I was doing. I fully expected to fall into a messy heap right after I said goodbye to Barney and Henry, but that didn’t happen, and I surprised myself by being really very okay. I did have everything in Barney’s and Henry’s room moved, cleaned and replaced within four hours of leaving them at the bus though… and I have kept busy since then, doing errands, taking the others swimming, etc. And I’ve been fine - in fact, I’ve not even shed a tear. But I can feel that about to change.

Scratchy phoned last night; it was a short call, as I was trying to get Toby to sleep and George was just getting back from Cubs, but he did say Barney had been a bit up-and-down all day. To be expected, really. It turns out that I was coping because Barney was coping though, because as soon as I’d heard that, I could feel my insides starting to churn. It’s daft - I mean, he could easily be up and down all day here - and of course nobody thought he’d continue to be wonderfully chirpy and positive for the next six months. But I can feel all the emotion of the thing just sitting there behind me, waiting to grab me by the throat and shake me.

Later today, we’ll be heading off to stay with friends for the next couple of nights. I’ve a feeling I’m going to need them.

I wrote the post below before I picked up my email - and got the photos below the fold.

Very deep breaths.

K, if you’re reading - have the tissues handy.
(more…)

Only about 180 days to go.

After a less-than-stellar start this morning - meltdowns and tears before breakfast - today turned out good.

Once breakfast was over, I did some French with George and Freddy while Jack drew and did a huge jigsaw puzzle on the kitchen floor with Toby’s “help”. Then we pulled out some of the guide-materials from our visit a couple of years ago to Vindolanda and Hadrian’s Wall, and talked about the Romans in Britain and how we know the things we do about them. Lunch was a cooperative effort between Freddy and George, and then we headed out into the garden to tidy it up a bit and have a look at the plant-pots from last year. We planted some sunflower seeds in those seed-tray things - the ones where you can grown individual plants? I don’t know what they’re called, because I’m not a very good gardener, but I bought some on Sunday, and planted some veg in them then. Today I found the three heads from last year’s sunflowers which had been hanging up in the garage all winter, and harvested the seeds from them. When I say “I’m not a very good gardener”, I really mean it - I had to google to figure out how to get the seeds from the sunflowers, and then again for images to make sure I was planting the right thing We did discover that one of our strawberry plants from last year is coming back, which was a pleasant surprise - and something else is re-growing too, though I can’t work out what it is. The shoots look familiar, but not quite familiar enough…

Toby managed to get hold of the bowl containing the rest of the sunflower seeds and pour them all on the conservatory floor, but I retrieved most of them. If they work well, I might get the Beavers to grow some too. Later George, Freddy and Jack drew mind-maps - we got a book on mind-maps for kids from the library and it’s really appealing to them. One of the mind-maps we did was on “things I like”, and Jack drew a picture of me as one of his links, “because I like you”

My Beavers co-leader wasn’t able to make it tonight, and our plan to make shoebox guitars wasn’t happening since we didn’t have any shoeboxes, but I managed to throw together a pretty good programme anyway. We started by playing Twenty Questions, with the first item being “eggs” and the second “faces”. Then each Beaver got an egg-shaped (and egg-sized) piece of cardboard to turn into a self-portrait (”faces”, see?), and we glued those all to a bigger “golden egg” made from gold cardboard, and put it on our notice-board. We had egg-and-spoon relay races, using Creme Eggs, and then in the last five minutes, the three race-teams had a contest to see how many ways of cooking eggs they could think of. The Beavers got a Creme Egg each to take home (but not the ones we’d used for the races, as they were a teensy bit mangled ;-))

In the meantime, one of the Beavers’ dads was outside, very kindly putting my spare tyre on, since I’d a tyre that was almost flat. Driving home was a bit scary though, as it was making big flump-flump noises - I don’t think it’s meant to do that, so I’m not going to drive on it again until the proper tyre is re-inflated or repaired or replaced, depending on what’s needed.

Earlier this week, every house on our street got a new box for recycling. Every house already had a bin for garbage and another bin for grass clippings etc (we hardly use that one, because we have a composter in the garden). Every house also already had one box into which we could put some recyclables but not others. Now we’ve got another box, which takes different recyclabes. And we got a nice big leaflet in the mailbox, explaining how to use the new box.

All well and good, if a little complicated.

Later the same day, a man called at the door. He was giving out leaflets about the changes to the recycling scheme too. Different leaflet, same information. Oh, and a big sticker for the old box, to remind us what went in it.

In the mailbox today, there was yet another leaflet - different from the previous two, but again providing the same information.

Three leaflets, all colourful and glossy, all saying the same thing in different formats. What was the point of this recycling lark again? Oh yes, to reduce the amount of household waste. Right.

I haven’t worked out yet if the leaflets themselves are recyclable.

I have spent this week exhausted. I couldn’t work out why, until a friend mentioned the clocks changing. That’s why I’m a wreck! I’m going to sleep at the “old” time (because that’s when my body wants to sleep) but I’m getting up at the “new” time (because that’s when the day starts). No wonder I’m yawning!

*rolls eyes at self for not figuring this out sooner*

The last couple of days have been spent getting back into the swing of normal life - partly because we couldn’t go anywhere while my car had the spare wheel on, partly because we (the boys and me) really needed to get “back to normal”. George had Cubs last night, but otherwise we’ve been homebirds. Freddy and George have been doing some French and some stuff on weather and some other stuff on the Romans and have, this morning, started learning German - because they wanted to. Jack is working on learning to read and write, and that’s coming along nicely. Toby tried to wrestle my watering-can from me, and when I found him a toy one in the garage, demanded that it be filled with water, so I let him play with it in the bath.

It appears that someone inadvertently started a rumour on a local email list that I was pregnant, but it’s actually someone else with the same name

Have just had an email from France to say Barney isn’t well - headache and throwing up

Wahey, we have our first teensy green shoot - the basil. I’m ridiculously pleased about this; as someone who has a thumb of - what’s opposite green on the colour-wheel? - anyway, I’m traditionally the kiss of death to anything involving leaves and soil. As I mentioned before, a couple of last year’s plants are growing back too: one of the strawberry plants and - well, anyone know what this is? Are the two shoots even the same plant? Can you tell what an expert I am?

We went to the library this morning, then ran some errands in town and I treated the boys to lunch at McJunk. The woman behind me in the line looked familiar, and when she started talking to me, I realised why - we met her on our way to the library one day over a year ago and got chatting. She was there with her kids because they’d just finished school for the day - as had the entire school down the street, and I think most of it was there buying burgers - argh. I really must start paying more attention to the schools’ dates.

Have just picked up an email from France (again). Barney’s still unwell and stayed home from school today. He’s been withdrawn and uncommunicative for the last couple of days too - maybe that’s because he’s ill, or maybe he’s ill because of stress? I just want to jump on a plane and go and hug him

We just spoke with Barney on the phone. He’s still got a headache, though he feels slightly better than before, and he sounds so down I think this is the beginning of the hardest part of the exchange: the novelty has worn off, nobody’s speaking your own language to you anymore, the next few months are stretching out ahead of you… he didn’t cry during the call, but I’m sure he did when it was finished (and he’s not the only one)