NotSheep

The first day of the second half of 2006.

Hm.

At the beginning of the year, I cheated on the “Five Goals” meme that was making the rounds, and rather than setting five goals in each category, I simply set five overall. I suppose the half-way mark is a good place to assess and reconsider, but in my case it’s also pretty depressing

* Eat better, get more exercise and (thus) lose weight.

I wasn’t doing too badly on this until about six weeks ago. I hadn’t lost much weight, but I was eating a bit healthier, and I had actually exercised a few (well, okay, about three) times. And then… I don’t know what happened, but now I’m back to no exercise, eating rubbish and all of the weight I’d lost is back.

* Take more photos.

I’ve done reasonably well on this one, I think. It does seem to happen in spurts, but having the camera as one of those things that goes with me wherever I go has definitely resulted in more photos.

* Get more positive with my parenting. I felt that I was getting close to being the kind of parent I want to be, but I seem to have drifted somehow. I don’t like it. I’m going to get back on course.

I think I’ve succeeded in this one to some extent, but not as much as I’d have liked. It’s working sometimes, but other times I don’t feel like a very effective parent at all. Time to re-read Coloroso et al, I think.

* Find some work that I get paid for - preferably self-employed (but what? )

No headway at all on this one. I still have no idea what I could do that would actually bring in some money.

* Have a general re-think for each of the children, in various ways.

I’ve thought about our family and education, but not really sat down and worked out what I think about (and what we should be doing with) individual children. I think Freddy needs more one-on-one time; I know Jack does. Some days it feels like I do nothing but put out fires that Jack started. I look at him when he’s asleep after such days and think what it must be like to be him right now. We really need to be more positive about how we interact with him.

Huh. Talking about doing that turned into actually doing a bit of it.

So am I going to achieve those goals in 2006? Based on my performance so far, it doesn’t look very likely. But if at first you don’t succeed…

I got tagged by Esther

5 things in my refrigerator:
- eggs
- pita bread
- juice
- lettuce
- tomatoes

5 things in my closet:
Erm… I don’t actually have a closet. Yes, that’s how much of a snappy dresser I am. The closest thing I have to a “closet” is probably the sofa in my bedroom I do have a couple of skirts hanging in the closet in the spare bedroom… can I count that?

5 things in my purse:
Assuming this is “purse” as used in North America, aka “handbag” for those of us in the UK
- my wallet
- my mobile phone
- my camera
- a sudoku book
- library cards
Bet none of that surprises anyone

5 things in my car:
- so many children’s carseats that I’ve lost count
- a few £1 coins, for paying for various kid activities
- books (always; I think they grow there)
- several maps that are probably too old to be any use anyway
- a pen, I’m sure… somewhere!

There were plants in it this afternoon though - flushed with success from the arrival of our first strawberry, and envious of H’s delicious salads we bought more strawb plants and some lettuce and tomato plants

5 people I am tagging:
- Jax, because she called me brave
- June, because she might do one of these someday, you never know!
- Sharon, because I bet there are trains in her car, closet and bag, and maybe even in her refrigerator
- Sue, because she’s about to move house so there might be interesting things in her car/bag
- Merry, because she has the same kind of car I do (though I think hers is quite a lot newer!) so there seems to be some kind of vague relationship there

I love this hot sunny weather!

On Monday we did a bit of work in the morning, but not much. Then the boys played outside for most of the rest of the day, while I read emails and blogs - all with Toby in my arms though, so not much commenting going on.

Monday evening brought jujitsu; Freddy was convinced that he was doing his first grading, Scratchy was convinced that wasn’t until next week. Freddy was right, and came home proudly bearing his certificate and his new belt

Today the oldest three were booked into a “Come and Try Day” at the leisure centre. The day didn’t get off to a great start when George wandered into my room and said “Do I have to go to the leisure centre?” (Answer: yes, you *** do - you said you wanted to and I’ve paid for it!) but that was only a temporary hiccup. They were there from 10 a.m. until 4 p.m., and in that time they got one hour on each of five different activities: tag rugby, trampolining, soccer, cricket and hockey. Lunch was also provided, so that made for a very easy day for me All of the activities except trampolining were outdoors, so they were all hot and sticky and exhausted when I collected them afterwards - but they all said they’d had a good time, and when I asked if they wanted me to check if there was room on the other Come and Try Day, they all said “yes” without hesitation. And there was, so they’re going back on Thursday to do it all again

As for me - with only two children, I didn’t know what to do with myself So I invited a friend over One of her children has a tendency to… er… well, let’s say he takes “getting into things” to a new dimension - so we all went outside and locked the patio door behind us The kids could get into the conservatory, but not the rest of the house, which made for a much more lazy relaxed day for the adults, who sat on the patio and chatted, with occasional forays indoors to deal with children’s needs for food and drink and other facilities

On the way home from the leisure centre, a request had been placed for ice-cream, so after dinner Scratchy went off to the shop. We originally thought to buy cones too, but then I thought that ice-cream sandwiches, with big soft chocolate-chip cookies, would be good. They didn’t really work though, as the ice-cream was too soft - but messy or not, they tasted good Despite that, we discovered later in the evening that the kids had raided the leftover junk from Sunday’s party, and lollipops were retrieved from under various pillows and mattresses

I’ve had a headache all day - I’ve been waking up with a headache nearly every morning recently; I don’t know what’s going on. Today’s eased a bit during the day but was back with a vengeance by early evening, so I took myself off to bed after the ice-cream, and fell asleep for two hours. My friend H says I need to eat more lemons; if I’d thought of it, I’d have asked Scratchy to pick some up at the shop this evening. I do always drink lots of water, but maybe I need to up my intake even more. I tried today to stick with fresh fruit and veg all day until dinner - for breakfast I made a fruit smoothie, for lunch I had lettuce (which I could claim was home-grown, but it would be a lie slight exaggeration, since we only bought the plants on Saturday ;-))

The weather forecast for tomorrow is hotter and sunnier than today, but after that it’s going to get cooler and cloudier again, so we plan to make the most of it. Hence my inflatable birthing pool has been retrieved from the garage and inflated, and is currently sitting on its side in the conservatory (and the door between conservatory and kitchen is shut, to keep the cats from exploring the pool LOL) The plan is to fill it tomorrow morning, and by the time it gets hot, the water in it should bring a welcome relief and plenty of fun

No blog last night because I was too busy having one of those heavy discussions with Scratchy. But there wasn’t a lot to say about yesterday anyway. Barney, George and Freddy went off to the leisure centre for another try-stuff day. I’m told that George chose not to participate in trampoline, despite having spent two hours every Saturday at trampoline club since last September - admittedly that had its ups and downs (har har, I didn’t really intend that LOL), but generally he enjoyed it and is quite good. I wonder if perhaps they were doing stuff he already knew; that’s the kind of thing that would put him off. He also said that the coach said he was too small to do a somersault - which, since he actually can do somersaults, was a very presumptuous thing to say, and would certainly be the type of thing to get George’s back up.

Barney, on the other hand, said that trampolining was his favourite activity yesterday. He’s the kid that dropped out of trampoline club after the first few weeks. Sheesh.

I got so bored at home with only two kids that I went shopping. Only groceries, so not very exciting, but it killed an hour or two, and I did buy myself a sun-hat. Of course that probably means there won’t be any more sunny days

As I said, long chat with Scratchy last night - I won’t bore you with all the details, but it was well overdue. I hope it has some improving effect on the things that need improving anyway. As it turns out, it’s just as well we talked last night, because I had an email this morning to say that Scratchy’s grandfather in New York has had a stroke and isn’t likely to survive more than days - possibly much less than that. So it looks like a trip to NYC is on the cards for Scratchy, and not a pleasant one

Scratchy’s grandpa passed away peacefully this morning. All four of his children got to see him before he died, and although he never regained consciousness, I think that’s probably something to be grateful for.

We’re now trying to find Scratchy a flight to New York City that doesn’t cost the earth - a task which is not made easier by not knowing yet when the funeral will be.

My washing machine has just poured water all over the garage floor

I thought at first the glass in the door was cracked, but I can’t see where. This leaves me with a problem: there is no way I’ll be able to get anyone to look at it until at least Friday, because everything is closed here on Wednesday and Thursday. There will be no way to get a repair or a replacement before then.

And I have at least two loads of nappies waiting to be washed.

This could get interesting

The washing machine has been revived. When Scratchy had a look, he says the door almost came off in his hands, so he has… er… shoved it back on, I think Anyway, another load of washing has been done (nappies! LOL) and it didn’t leak again, so we’ll just keep an eye on it for now, and have a think about watching out for a good deal on a newer one. I’d really like one of those ones that takes a ginormous load, but I expect that would be more expensive that I can justify - probably cheaper to buy two normal-sized ones! Less electricity usage though… *ponders*

Apart from the minor flood on the garage floor - and it really was minor, it was only a couple of millimetres deep at its deepest, and only spread out a few feet, and there’s nothing on the garage floor that would suffer from getting wet anyway - and we’ve done the major-flood thing before (for “minor flood”, read “lake”), and believe me, after that, it takes a lot of water to scare me! - where was I? oh yeah, apart from the minor flood on the garage floor, today was busy and productive. The boys did a bit of work in the morning - we’re just finishing up a few bits and pieces so we can put them away, then we headed out to do some errands. As I mentioned in the previous post, everything will be closed from late afternoon tomorrow until Friday - some things will be open on Thursday, but not much, and anyway, Scratchy will be leaving for the airport then - so I wanted to stock up on easy-to-prepare meals etc. I had to get the huge bags of charity-shop stuff out of the car before I could fit in groceries though! So the first stop was the Barnardo’s shop in town, where I double-parked and struggled in with my donations - about five trips into the shop! After that Barney ran into the library to leave off a book that someone had requested, and I took money from one bank and put it into another. That makes us sound like we actually have money Then we went to a third bank where the kids have their accounts, and put in their pocket-money. We’ve decided they’ll be getting their pocket-money monthly, as usual, but they’ll get some in cash each week too. Over the summer the cash will be minimal, but it will be more from September - the catch is that they’re going to have to pay their own Scout subs, jujitsu fees, etc out of it. Barney will be expected to budget for his own clothes etc too - that won’t be a major bother for him, I suspect, since as long as what he’s wearing is comfortable, he doesn’t care if it’s old or new, clean or dirty, fits or doesn’t

I bought some groceries after that, though not much since I didn’t get as far as the big grocery-store. I’d a choice between trying to get around that with five children in half an hour or so, or taking said five children to the playground so they could let off some of the energy that had built up all day in the car. The latter option won, and Scratchy did the big shop while they were at jujitsu in the evening

It was the last night of jujitsu before the summer break, so they had a games night. Freddy was thrilled to have won the knockout thingy they do each week. He’s definitely the sportiest one of the boys so far.

We also stopped at Argos during the afternoon to buy another cheap mp3 player Freddy wanted one of his own, so I made him an offer: I’d put £5 towards it if he paid the other £10. Barney got a similar offer: if he gave me £10, “our” mp3 player would become “his”. They both went for it, so there was much putting-of-mp3s-on-players last night. It is so funny how their tastes in music reflect their personalities. Barney is into Abba and Bohemian Rhapsody. George - the one with style, flair and presence - chose Mick Jagger and Robbie Williams (and wandered about singing “come on rock your body” LOL). Freddy - the self-described “utterly mad” child, and definitely the loud one! - went for Lordi (”Hard Rock Hallelujah”, remember? LOL) and Billy Idol

Scratchy has finally booked his flights - he’d reserved them yesterday, but today he actually paid for them. He’ll be leaving for the airport on Thursday afternoon - about a 2.5 hour train journey, a bit longer by bus (I’m not sure what way he’s doing that bit), because flights from the more local airports were a lot more expensive. He’ll be hanging out in the airport during the night, because he has to check in so early it’s not worth going somewhere to find a bed - but he can catch up on sleep on the plane, and at least it’s a direct flight. He’ll arrive on Friday, there’s a wake on Sunday and the funeral will be Monday, then he flies back on Tuesday - assuming he doesn’t decide that being young, free and single in the Big Apple is more appealing than an office job and five kids on the Emerald Isle!

The washing machine is not fixed. Oh, sure, it’s not pouring water all over the floor now, but it’s also not actually washing the laundry. It’s going through the cycle, filling and emptying - only perhaps not emptying. The water is going out, but the laundry coming out is still very wet, very detergent-y, and, I suspect, not very clean.

Would buying a large-volume, energy-efficient machine be justifiable, do you think?

The last couple of days have been quiet. Scratchy’s been off work (public holidays), but of course he’s been getting ready to leave for NYC; I’ll be leaving him at the airport bus this evening. The washing-machine is working, sort of, I think - not sure it’s rinsing stuff properly, so am still considering the purchase of a larger one. The particular larger one I’m considering takes a 9kg load - exactly twice what my current one does. The notion of cutting my laundry in half (well, the washing-it bit anyway) at a stroke is appealing, I must admit.

Scratchy’s been doing that male I’m-fine-yes-I-am thing, and has been taking his supposedly non-existent stress out on the rest of the family, alternating between snappy and grumpy. I must admit that it has occasionally crossed my mind to suggest that he leave for the airport sooner rather than later

The boys put together a huge model of a velociraptor yesterday, and have been reading the book that came with it. Barney has been doing lots of science study in the last few days, but mostly he’s been reading or playing outside. He has been skateboarding, which he thinks makes him look very cool. It might do that, if he could go more than two miles an hour and not wobble He’s off to camp with a friend tomorrow night - for the friend’s birthday treat, his parents are taking a bunch of boys to camp one night and spend the next day doing outdoorsy activities. He’s looking forward to it, especially since he hasn’t seen this friend in several months, and misses him.

George and Freddy spent most of this morning playing with the cuisenaire rods. George is permanently attached to his mp3 player, so all communication with him takes place at 95 decibels. He was playing down the street earlier and I called him back because I could hear him shouting. I told him the volume wasn’t reasonable, but he argued that it was, because a bit of K’nex had fallen down the drain. Quite why he thought yelling at it would help is beyond my comprehension.

Freddy is currently riding his bicycle up and down the street at top speed. Despite it being mid-July and actually sunny and reasonably warm, he’s wearing a duffle-coat. I gave up asking.

Jack is being his usual determined self and appears to have been born in a barn - every door in the house is open, except for those that slammed shut due to the breeze.

Toby is being delightful, as usual. He is very determined to be up on his feet, which means one of us has to stand there and hold onto him. I think he might have slept a six-hour stretch on Tuesday night, though he didn’t repeat it last night! He’s talking lots these days, and is getting very good at letting us know exactly what he wants.

As for me, I’ve been trying to get all the things done that I know I won’t get a chance to do while Scratchy’s away. Toby still spends a lot of time in my arms - which is not something I mind, as I know it won’t last forever and I’ve never met anyone who wished they’d cuddled their babies less - but it does make it more difficult to get certain things done. I can use the Storchie, but his hands are everywhere - if I’m trying to cut up cheese or something, I need a hand to hold the cheese, a hand to cut it, and two more hands to keep his hands out of the way Fortunately the boys’ activities have all finished for the summer, so I won’t be providing the taxi-service that’s usually necessary - though they do have swimming every day next week, so we’ll have to be semi-organised anyway.

We spent most of the day at a friend’s house. H and I sat outside and chatted, and barely saw the children at all Meanwhile they played and dressed up (George makes a very friendly Darth Vader ;-)), climbed on and off the trampoline and the hammock, and generally had fun. H gave me a tour of her vegetable patch: she has carrots, potatoes, onions, herbs, broccoli, cauliflower, berries, tomatoes, courgettes, several kinds of lettuce… it goes on and on and on. I am in awe of her She told me she’d never grown anything before, but I don’t believe a word of it - it’s all much too impressive! She served me a delicious sandwich for lunch, made with just-picked-a-minute-ago lettuce and nasturtiums and home-sprouted sprouts, and had the nerve to apologise for the bread not being homemade Not only does she usually bake her own bread, but - get this - she mills her own wheat for the flour. Next time someone tells me I’m an earth-mother, I will be pointing them in H’s direction!

She sent me home with bags of wheat and rye, which I’m going to chuck in the food processor tomorrow to see how it manages to mill them, so that I can edge slightly closer to self-sufficient status

Tomorrow had better be better. Let’s put it this way: it’s 8 p.m. and despite it still being bright, sunny and hot outside, my kids have already been in bed for over an hour. It’s for their own safety.

Freddy and George spent this morning “tidying” their room. After two hours, it looked no different. I re-filled the pool and told them they could go out once it was done; by noon they’d finally picked up the stuff off the floor.

I made lunch and served it outside, waving away the occasional wasp and repeatedly telling Jack not to lean on the very rickety table. They fought over who was going to sit in what chair. They fought over who was going on the trampoline next. They fought over who’d left the patio door open (goal for today: clean the conservatory door-frame and put up flyscreens). I was grateful when it was time to leave to pick up Barney, because we really needed to get out of here.

We met A, one of the adults with Barney, along the road between here and where they’d been camping. Barney climbed into the back of the car, we drove off, and within a minute he was having an argument with George and Freddy. They bickered - really, bickered is the only word for it, it couldn’t even qualify as anything else - until I finally swung the car into a side-road and told them to shut up or get out. Not one of my more laudable parenting moments

Dinner was presented early - there are lots of hot-dog buns in the refrigerator, so I sent Barney to look for hot-dogs in the freezer. He came back saying there weren’t any, so I made pizza. While it was cooking, I looked in the freezer to see what we could eat tomorrow, and found the hot-dogs.

They’re now in bed, silent except for Jack, who, having slept in the car today (no doubt the only reason he wasn’t involved in the bickering), is still awake and singing. He’s made his way through “It’s the end of the world as we know it”, and is now singing various versions of “It’s raining men” - so far I’ve heard “It’s raining people” and “It’s raining food”. Interesting choices for a four-year-old

Today was vastly better than yesterday. On a scale of 1 to 10, I think it might even deserve a 5

Barney had a bit of a moment when he first got up - still not caught up on sleep - but George came out doing his I-will-be-a-perfect-child-today act. It didn’t last, of course, but hey, at least he tried.

In no particular order:
- the four oldest all spent time playing with the Cuisenaire rods
- all four of them disappeared, to be found in the garden next-door-but-one - I brought two back with me
- George and Jack spent about an hour skimming leaves and bugs and stuff out of the pool, but Jack only spent about ten minutes playing in it, and George didn’t get in at all
- Barney played on the computer
- we ate lunch outside again, and fended off more wasps
- they spent time playing with neighbourhood friends: N and B (boys), G, E and H (girls). Even anti-girl Freddy.
- at lunch, Barney asked what job I thought he should have. I said I didn’t know, and asked him what he thought. That led into a conversation about careers. Barney wants to do something in robotics. George wants to be a scientist. Freddy wants to teach babies how to talk properly.
- I did get the bug-screen up on the conservatory door, and it works pretty well - not as good as a proper screen door, but not bad
- Toby and I fell asleep in the garden late in the afternoon
- after dinner, N and B came over and they all watched a movie, trashed the living-room, and tidied it up again

Swimming week starts tomorrow, so we’ll have to get organised with swimsuits and towels right after breakfast.

A very up-and-down day indeed.

I woke at about 4.38 (approximately ;-)) and couldn’t get back to sleep. Eventually I sat up and read email while nursing Toby, then lay down and read more email while still nursing Toby, until I finally felt my eyes closing - just as everyone else was ready to get up.

On the bright side, I didn’t wake up with a headache today - the first time in a while. They’re cluster headaches - so-called because they occur in clusters. They’re similar to migraines, much less common, but no less debilitating. The pattern varies, but I tend to get one every day at the same time for a while, then they go away. I seem to get them shortly after having a baby - probably down to a combination of not sitting in a good position, getting slightly dehydrated, and not getting enough fresh air. But this lot started a few weeks ago, and I’m waking with one, and it’s lasting most of the day. If waking before 5 a.m. is what it’s going to take to get rid of them, I’ll do it. I’d really rather not though

Anyway, managed to get a shower to wake me up a bit (more than a bit, really, since there was no hot water). Barney yelled at Freddy over breakfast, so I, setting a good example, yelled at Barney We got the kitchen cleaned up a bit, gathered all the swimming stuff and got in the car.

I did a couple of errands, then we hung out in the playground at the leisure centre for a while until it was time for swimming for Barney, George and Freddy. They’re going every day this week. About five minutes before we were going to go in, the fire-alarm went off and we saw the manager running back to the centre from the playing-fields, followed by the evacuation of all the summer scheme kids, so that was a bit interesting. As we were heading into the building, a fire-engine pulled up - but by then the staff knew what had happened (one of the summer scheme kids had broken the glass on one of the fire alarms).

While the older three swam, Jack and Toby and I went to the cafeteria, so I could watch them. I made the mistake of giving Jack his pocket-money before we went in, and he muttered about buying a “Sonic toy” from one of the machines, and I said no, don’t put your money in the machines, so of course you can guess what he did. Two pound coins. I had my back to him, but I knew what he’d done as soon as I turned around and saw him standing in front of the machines, with his back to them and his arms wrapped backwards around them, as if I wasn’t going to notice these five-feet-high and two-feet-wide things as long as he kept them behind his back… I don’t know what he did, but he didn’t even get any toys out of them

When the lesson finished, we headed down to the changing rooms, and I stood outside the mens changing waiting for the boys. They all took ages - particularly Barney, and he might have been better off getting out fast, because the waiting gave me time to get a complaint about his behaviour from one of the other kids in the class. *Sigh*

Into the car, fed them muffins and apples for lunch while we drove to the grocery-store. (See? I do get some parenting stuff right. I mean, I might go shopping regularly when my stomach’s empty, but I know better than to do it when theirs are! LOL) That’s where we spotted the barbecue.

We were glad to get home, because although my car has air-conditioning, it hasn’t worked for years. It probably just needs filled up with whatever it is they fill air-conditioning units with, but we’ve never got round to doing it. I think I might have to look into it though…

I had done a load of laundry before I left, and hung it out to dry and started another load of laundry (nappies! again!) - which should have been finished by about 10.30. We got home between 2.30 and 3, and it was still going around and around… I pushed it forward to the rinse-cycle, and - oops! the garage floor got washed again. Now this time we know it’s not a blockage or a kink in a hose or something - and once I’d drained it and spun it, I was able to put it through a rinse-cycle without a problem (except for sore knees from sitting in front of it watching just in case LOL) - so where does that leave us?

Anyway, got them rinsed and hung out and got the groceries put away and the boys started to assemble the barbecue. That took up the rest of the afternoon, and then we put it to use and made dinner on it

I did a sergeant-major clean-up session after dinner - that’s me, giving orders and the boys running about trying to keep up. So the kitchen is now reasonably tidy, the living-room is spotless, and while George and Freddy’s room could use work (how do they do that? they just tidied it yesterday!), there’s nothing on the landing waiting to knock me down the stairs if I have to get up during the night.

Been thinking about Scratchy a lot - the funeral was today. I was going to send him a text-message, but I didn’t want to send it too early, in case I woke him, and I didn’t want to send it during the day, because I don’t know what time the funeral was taking place and was afraid he’d have his phone on and it would beep in the middle of it all. If there was any chance of me being awake at midnight, I might have sent him a text then and asked if he was at his grandfather’s house, and rung there if so - but given how early I was up this morning, there’s not much chance of me seeing 10 p.m., never mind anything later

I really really really really really really hope that Barney left the refrigerator door ajar last night after he got himself a drink.

Because if he didn’t, the butter and cheese etc are warm and soft and the milk is off and everything else is room-temperature because the refrigerator has broken down.

The door is now firmly closed, and I am leaving it that way until just before I have to go out, when I will nervously open it to see if the butter is any harder.

ARGH!

That’s just one of the many pieces of information I learned today. A polar bear’s fur is actually made up of hollow tubes, which look white because each one reflects the light. They also redirect heat along them towards the bear’s body, so making the most of whatever is available. Kind of like those sun-tubes you can get that reflect the sunlight from your roof down into a dark room. Cool, huh?

Of course I’d never have known this if my children hadn’t told me. This home-ed lark improves the education of the whole family

Another thing I learned today:

It was the refrigerator door. *Deb wipes brow, and not just because it’s a hot day*

We fitted some appliance-window-shopping around today’s swimming lesson (during which Barney, warned that if he messed about again he’d be paying for the week’s lessons himself, behaved impeccably). Since I didn’t know, at that point, whether a new washing machine or a new refrigerator was the more urgent purchase, I looked at both. After a couple of shops, though, I decided it was way too hot and sticky to be spending in the car and in appliance-shops. On that note - of all places, wouldn’t you think that the shops which sell air-conditioners and fans might actually, uh, have some air-conditioning, or at least some fans running? Apparently people who work in shops which sell air-conditioning and fans aren’t very bright.

(No offence meant if you’re reading this and you happen to work in one of those shops, but hey, y’know… if you’re standing by a big pile of fans in boxes and the sweat is running down your face… uh, think!)

So we headed home and out to the garden. This presented a difficult question: did I sit in the middle of the garden, under the parasol so I was in the shade, or did I sit on the patio, in the sunlight but with my legs dangling into the pool? If I hadn’t been holding Toby, I’d have been in the pool - but as it turned out, Toby made the decision for me by falling asleep on my chest under the parasol. He’s quite the little radiator too

Scratchy phoned this afternoon - from his mobile, don’t ask me why - to see if there was anything I wanted him to buy, as he had five hours before he needed to leave for the airport. Unfortunately the only things I would like from NYC are either things I need to be there in person to choose (like shoes) or things that aren’t really going to come home on a plane with him (like a new washing-machine). He said he’d considered buying me some jade, but I told him forget it, go for a washing-machine instead. Romance? Shomance. Give me good appliances any day.

He’ll be back at lunchtime-ish tomorrow; I’ll probably pick him up after the boys finish swimming.

After dinner this evening, my friend J came by with Chip, who we’re going to be doggy-sitting for the next few weeks. Chip is a girl. The people who sold Chip to J’s family told them that Chip was a boy, and they didn’t know any better - hence the name. It wasn’t until Chip made a visit to the vet, who said “um… i have news for you”, that they discovered they had a girl named Chip. Anyway. It’s interesting how difficult it is to get your head around calling a dog named Chip “he”!

Right, off to browse washing-machine websites now. Wish me luck

…and the question is: What planet is he on?!

Testing ’should be intensified’

The pressure on England’s teachers to get pupils through tests and improve school results should be intensified, said Education Secretary Alan Johnson. Mr Johnson told a committee of MPs league tables were “absolutely the right thing” for raising standards. Teachers’ unions have repeatedly called for an end to “high stakes” testing and to the compilation of league tables. Mr Johnson told the education select committee he backed “the whole kit and caboodle” of school accountability. That included Ofsted inspections, national tests and exams and league tables. He added: “If anything, we need to intensify that rather than relax.” He said standards of reading, writing and maths had improved dramatically in primary schools since Labour came to power.

Recent lines from the boys:

Scratchy brought home Batman and Spiderman toys from Grandma. One of them has suction-cups on the wings (that would be Batman, yes?) so that you can stick it to the window, where it hangs as though he was considering suicide. Yesterday afternoon, George stuck it to the patio door.

George: “What are ya doin’? That looks like a sticky situation!”
Freddy: “Oh, I’m just hangin’ around…”

We have Mr Potato Head on our refrigerator door - it’s a set of magnets. There’s a potato-shaped frame, ears, eyes, moustache, hat, arms, shoes etc. Jack carefully arranged them into a face this morning, then mixed them all up like mad. “Look!”, he said, “I made mashed potato!”

We got a Pizza Hut leaflet in the post this week. Jack was looking at it this evening and said “This is the instructions for how to make pizza! When we don’t know how to make pizza, I will read it!” I said, “Oh, what does it say about making pizza then?” He replied, “You cut it in half, and then you eat it!” Pretty good “pizza instructions” for a four-year-old

We didn’t have pizza for dinner though, we barbecued again. That’s the fourth time this week. I don’t like cooking or eating indoors in weather like this; it’s too hot. I like the hot weather, just not the adding-to-the-heat-by-cooking bit. So I think we’ve probably already had our money’s worth from the barbecue

I spent most of the day in the car. Our canine visitor is used to sleeping outside in a shed, so can’t be allowed to roam the house at night. We’ve been putting him her (I still can’t get my head around that girl-named-Chip thing) in the conservatory, but it’s not ideal - for a start, it gets warm in the mornings (it faces east) and also he she eats the strawberry plants So I put a “wanted” ad on the local Freecycle - just on the off-chance that someone had a kennel we could have. And I got one! It’s the perfect size for Chip, and the guy who offered it to us works not far from here, so I picked it up from him this morning

Barney, George and Freddy had their last day of swimming today, and got attendance certificates. I was hoping the instructor might assess George, since he was at Cub Camp when the assessments took place at the end of the last session, but she didn’t, so he’ll be in the same class again in September. They can move up during sessions now though, so it won’t really matter.

After lunch we went in search of a washing-machine. I am really miffed, because I could get the model I want for a lot less money if any of the UK web-retailers would deliver to us. Even at the cheapest price I can find here, it’s going to cost us over £100 more

I realised about five minutes ago that Twelfth Night was on in one the local parks tonight. The boys went to see A Midsummer Nights Dream last year and really enjoyed it, and this year the town was putting on two plays in the park. We knew we’d miss Romeo and Juliet last week, because even if Scratchy hadn’t been away, Barney was camping - but we intended to go to tonight’s play, and if I’d remembered 45 minutes sooner, we would have. I’m so cross that I forgot about it

If you can’t see the story of today and the rest of the photos below this post, it’s because you’re not registered and signed in

My new washing-machine is arriving tomorrow morning. Just as well, because I haven’t had time this week to sit and watch the old one in case it floods, so the laundry has been piling up. We’re into the “we don’t particularly like these but they’ll do” nappies, and I’ve got one clean(ish) shirt left. So of course the forecast for the next week is - rain

The flippin’ dog has been leaving a trail of destruction: she’s eaten through the top ring on the swimming-pool (it will still function, it will just be not as deep - if it ever stops raining, that is :roll:), has knocked over one of our pots of sunflowers and eaten the plants and left compost all over the garden, and has trailed the plants in the conservatory out of their pots and left the floor there covered in compost too (though admittedly that was mainly the fault of whichever child left the door into the conservatory open so she could get in). I’ve moved all the plants into the driveway for now - against the side of the house, in front of the gate, and I’ll figure out what to do with them later. I don’t hold out much hope for the strawberries, but the tomato and lettuce should be okay, and we’ve still one pot of sunflowers left.

I don’t seem to have got much anything done today at all; I’ve not felt properly woken up all day, and could cheerfully have gone back to bed after lunchtime. I did manage to phone my insurance broker about yesterday’s collision, and it doesn’t look like it will cost me money: he says the insurance company will recoup any money I have to pay out for repairs from the insurance of the van-driver, and although they might temporarily take away my no-claims bonus, it will be reinstated once the claim’s settled.

As for the kids, they’ve done a little more than me. Barney did a bit of kakuro in a book he bought yesterday - I’m vowing not to join in, because I haven’t time for another obsession They all played on the computers a bit, and in the afternoon they got out a science kit on magnets, but it didn’t last long - Freddy said it was boring, and to be honest he wasn’t far off. Quite disappointing, that one.

The best line of today came from Barney, who said, “Jack is my treasure.” Cue stares of disbelief all around. Well, what he actually said was, “Jack is my treasurer” (part of a game), but I like the version I thought I heard better, and am not going to let him forget it in a hurry

Scratchy’s gone off to basketball; Barney chose to stay at home and do more kakuro rather than go with him.

Freddy has just come and sat in front of me and asked, “Can I do some work?” When I said, “What work?”, he replied, “Maths”. Hm. We’re obviously killing that desire to learn then.

Send Scratchy to register Barney, George and Freddy for swimming lessons starting in September, since we weren’t organised enough to get in for pre-open-registration on time.

Feed children.

Remove many bicycles from garage so washing-machine, when it arrives, can be wheeled straight in from the front to the back (this will be much easier than it would have been a week ago, because now the garage is actually tidy and organised).

Await delivery of washing-machine.

Install washing-machine.

Do a load of laundry.

Look for a place to hang it to dry, because it’s raining.

Do another load of laundry.

Look for more places to hang it to dry, because it’s raining.

Repeat ad infinitum.

I have a very new, very shiny and very, very big washing-machine. It arrived about an hour late (they told me between 10 and 12, it came about 1). I’m told that it will wash 20 pairs of jeans at one time. My first reaction to that information was “yeah, like I’m ever going to need to wash 20 pairs of jeans!” - my second reaction was “eek, that might actually happen!”

We got all the packaging off, then discovered there was a screw of some kind in the back of it that we had to remove before installing it. We didn’t have a big enough - oh, I don’t know, whatever the required tool is. It was suggested that Scratchy go ask our neighbour, R, if he has one, but he decided to delay that until the torrential rain eased off a bit.

The instructions say to remove the screw, “making sure it does not fall into the machine”. Scratchy removed the screw. Guess what happened next?

As he removed the back of the washing-machine in an attempt to retrieve the lost screw, he said, “It should be in there.” This wasn’t exactly confidence-inspiring, considering that the last time he said something similar, it took three solid days to get my laptop working again - but in this case, he was right, and a few minutes later we had it all in place and hooked up. An hour or so later, we’d made enough sense of the instructions to be able to actually use it

Now if only it would stop raining so I could get the stuff dry once it’s clean

How did our great-grandparents ever manage without washing-machines?

“I don’t be-lieeeve it!”

Do you remember when, a couple of weeks ago, just when I was about to start shopping for a new washing-machine, everything in the refrigerator got warm overnight? And I didn’t know if it was broken or if Barney had left the door open? And then it got cold again and so I decided it must have been Barney?

Well. I might have been wrong.

Yesterday morning everything in the refrigerator was - not warm, but not nearly as cold as it should have been. It was pulled out and unplugged and re-plugged-in and played with and listened to carefully to try to establish whether the motor was running. Eventually I gave it a thump on its side (well, it used to work when my grandfather did it to the television…) and the motor started whirring again.

Except that a couple of hours later it wasn’t going again. And thumping it again didn’t work. And the milk went off. And this morning, the other contents are room temperature and some of them are only fit for the bin.

*Sigh*

I promise I’ll blog about something other than household appliances shortly. Honest.

I know you’re all bored to tears by now, but I have to moan one more time.

The refrigerator is almost certainly not worth fixing; I’m guessing it’s the same age as the house, which is the same age as Barney (actually recorded with the land registry people on the day of his birth!) and the call-out charge is about half of what we’d pay for a new one.

However. I can’t get anything at all in beige linen sandstone (because only one manufacturer ever made things in that colour and now they’ve stopped) and the other colours are going to look stupid with the kitchen. I didn’t choose the kitchen. I quite like it, but if I’d chosen it, I’d have picked something easier to match not look stupid with.

And I can hardly find anything to fit the space we have. All the newer refrigerators are wider - there must be masses of people who have narrower slots for them, but apparently in this case supply does not follow demand, as the manufacturers are phasing out the “old” standard size and bringing in a “new” standard size which is just a few centimetres wider - not enough to make a real difference in the space inside the fridge, but enough so the damn thing won’t fit in the kitchen.

We could make the space slightly wider by taking off part of a cupboard - probably a couple of hours work for a carpenter - but then we’d lose one of the biggest cupboards in our kitchen because the door to it wouldn’t open past the front of the refrigerator.

We could buy a bigger refrigerator - this would really be far better for us, but there’s only one place it could go in the kitchen, which is a) on the other side of the breakfast bar/table thing, and b) where the aquarium now lives - and there’s nowhere else for the aquarium. And of course would leave an ugly great hole under the counter.

In short, it is not possible to buy anything suitable. So I get to spend my money on something that’s the wrong size, the wrong colour and the wrong design.

There’s been precious little of educational value around here recently, unless you count learning to stay well clear when there’s a refrigerator crisis. I did buy a replacement today, it’s silver (wrong colour) and I don’t like it, but of all those I’ve seen, it’s the one I don’t-like least, if you see what I mean. However it works, and that’s something. The washing-machine, on the other hand - well, it’s bloomin’ fantastic. My bed is a North American king-size, and I can fit in the duvet cover and the two sheets and the pillowcases and a normal day’s worth of laundry. Fandabeedozie

In other news… well, not much. The bloke who hit the car that then hit me last week (if you didn’t read it, you’re not signed in…) rang and said he’d like to pay for the damage rather than put it through his insurance. The car he hit is a write-off - but it’s still cheaper for him to pay for it himself than to pay the increased premiums if he claims on his insurance. Boggling. I’d be spitting feathers about paying business-rate insurance premiums and then having to pay for it all out of my own pocket anyway, but he seems to have a very good attitude about it all. My car is going to see the mechanic on Thursday, so we should have a price to give him then.

I spent the morning on the phone, trying to source a you-know-what, and finally found the one I’d settled for in a shop about an hour away. They shoved it up to their back door, I dropped off some children at the leisure-centre, and went to collect it. George had trampoline club for two hours today (and every day this week), but in order to get there before the shop closed, I had to leave him there early. Although George is old enough to go swimming without an adult, I didn’t want to leave him there alone (especially given that his moods were fairly swinging today), so I left Barney with him. I suggested they took books to read, but instead they each took a GameBoy, mp3 player and mobile phone. I think one of the mp3 players might have had an audio-book on it though. I could actually have collected the you-know-what in the back of my car even with all five children in it - a friend once said that my car does a very good impression of a white van - but the timing wouldn’t have worked. So.

Drove back across the city in pelting rain, and spent far too long sitting in traffic - which made both Toby and me very cross - and Freddy was consequently late for his trampoline club (which takes place after George’s), but we eventually made it back, and a bit later than that, we eventually made it home and got dinner.

End of July. And an expensive July too. Hope August turns out a bit less spendy!